Two Vaginas Walk Into a Bar…

*A tale of Cunnilingus*

Even as proud owners of nature’s most beautiful and powerful flower- women often can be totally clueless to the glory between their own legs. Not only clueless- but even ashamed, and totally disconnected on how to derive pleasure from both it on their own and with a partner.

First- let us understand the basics.

The vulva includes:

• The outer and inner vaginal lips.
• The clitoris, nestled under the upper junction of the vaginal lips.
• The vaginal opening.
• And the erotically sensitive groove between the clitoris and vagina, the urethral sponge.

“Cunnilingus” comes from the Latin cunnus for vulva, women’s external genitalia, and lingere, to lick. Ah. Perhaps the most lovely word in all of language.

Despite it’s beautiful sound and meaning cunnilingus is less popular in lives of women that we ever thought. According to a recent survey by researchers at Indiana University’s Kinsey Institute, 75 percent of adult women have received it at least once, with 60 percent of those age 21 to 49 saying they’ve received it during the past year, and 33 percent of women over 50.

That’s a crying shame. As far as we are concerned- every sexually active woman should be getting her flower tantalized as much as humanly possible.

SO why aren’t we?


Many women feel self-conscious about the aroma and taste of their genitals, and spend $150 million a year on douches. Gynecologists deride douching as hygienically unnecessary. Natural cervical mucus keeps the vagina clean, and washing with soap and water keeps the vulva clean and tasting like the mouth during deep kissing.  “If women think their genitals look, smell, or taste unattractive,” says Palo Alto, California, sex therapist Marty Klein, Ph.D., “it’s difficult to persuade your partner otherwise. But I encourage everyone to say to their partner: ‘I love how you look.’ ‘I love how you taste.’ Everyone likes compliments, and over time, she might change her mind.”

The survey conducted showed that 9 out of 10 women feel uncomfortable even talking about their vaginas. Which makes us curious- how does this number translate into women being comfortable with a partner spending a significant amount of time getting a taste of them?

Nearly 40 per cent of women were unsure if their vagina was the right size and 13 per cent had “major concerns” about its appearance, according to the study, which was funded by the makers of a contraceptive product and published in the journal Contraception.

And no wonder people are confused. Vaginas, it seems, are as different as women are. Even small studies have found massive difference in the size, shape and colouring of women’s vaginas.


We believe that the journey to loving your vagina may be one of your life’s most important missions for women. Without the self love- there can be no self pleasure- no partner pleasure. And this is simply a crying shame.

So what do we do?

1. Educate Yourself.

Look at photos. Or women’s actual vaginas. Not porn. Read articles. Learn the facts. Realize that you taste and look human. And humanity is beautiful. The right partner will know that.

2. Remind Yourself that Your Vagina is Awesome.

All the weird and magical things it does has a purpose. Your menstrual cycle happens because our bodies can have have sustained the human race. HOLY HELL! Your vagina

is a self cleaning oven. You don’t need to perfume and douche and try to make it smell and taste like roses. It should smell and taste like a vagina. Soap and water- normal proper hygiene is enough for the vagina. This and regular STD testing and pap smears- you’re good to go.

3. Look at Your Beautiful Self.

Know all the layers. All the ins and outs. Look at it and love it. Today is the most beautiful it will ever be. Admire it like you admire a work of art on the wall of a gallery. The vagina is a perfect thing- in all it’s imperfection.


Often. Know how you cum. Realize that every woman does it a different way. Know so that you can be confident in telling your partner how to make you wet. Good partners want is to make you feel amazing. The vagina is like your soul in that way. If you don’t know how to love it yourself- you can never teach someone else how to love it.

YOUR MISSION TODAY- if you so choose to accept it.

Love your vagina.
Then find someone amazing- and let them love it too.